Angela and I: Spanish or English?

I originally posted this article to my Sitzman ABC blog, but I thought some Sitzblog readers might be interested, too. If you are, check it out:

Language Use in Bilingual Couples and Families

My wife Angela and I. Or should I say, "Mi esposa �ngela y yo"?
Or even, "Meine Frau Angela und ich"?

As you may know, I'm from the USA, so my native language is English. I'm married to a Costa Rican named Angela, and her native language is obviously Spanish. One question that people ask us a lot is "What language do you speak at home?" The answer is that we alternate between the two languages, but sometimes people are surprised at how infrequently we switch languages: once a year.

That's right, every August 25th (the way we chose that date is a more complicated story) we change languages. So about two weeks ago, we ended an English year and started a Spanish year. There are some advantages and some disadvantages to this approach.

I've heard of some couples or families that switch between languages every month, week, or even every day, but I think that would be a bit too confusing. The way we do it, once you start a new language year, it's very unlikely that you'll forget which language you're supposed to speak. As a result, one person can really work on building up his or her fluency. You can also avoid falling into a "Spanglish" trap wherein you speak a mixture of two languages, which can be confusing for you or some onlookers (or in this case "onlisteners," I guess).

There are also some disadvantages. In the case of Angela and I, we usually prefer to not speak our native language. In other words, I prefer our Spanish years, and Angela prefers our English years since we both want to practice a language that's foreign to us. With this approach, one of us has to go for most of a year with little practice in the target language. We do still speak English with my friends and family and Spanish with Angela's. Also, while living in Costa Rica many daily interactions out of home are in Spanish, but we both speak mostly English at work, so at least there's always some practice of both languages.

One big question mark for the future is what we'll do if we have kids. As I noted in my articles about naming customs (USA here and Costa Rica here), we don't even know what last names our kids would have, and we're also unsure how to best raise a bilingual child. I've heard that it's best if each parent always speaks his or her native language with the children so the children don't mix up the two languages. But if we had a kid and it were a Spanish year, for example, it would maybe be weird for me to speak English with the kid and Spanish with Angela, all in the same conversation. I guess we'll cross that bridge if/when we come to it.

What about you? Are you in a bilingual or multilingual family or relationship? Do you know anyone who is? How do you handle it, or how would you handle it if you were? Wow, we have a great opportunity here to practice conditional tenses! 

Thanks for reading, and have a great day!

We're still not sure if our kids will prefer Spanish or English, but at least we can
rest assured that they'll grow up with camouflage skirts and Iron Maiden music. 

"The Gift That Keeps On Giving": A Play in One Act

Cast of Characters:

Jane: A charming young woman, with tragic taste in Fathers' Day gifts

Pete: A charming young man, swashbuckler

Orange Julius Crier

Beautiful Girl

Mall Patrons and/or Dregs of Society

Scene: "Suburbia, U.S.A."

Act I, Scene 1

As the curtain rises, we see a bench at a mall. There is hustle, bustle, and the sound of the criers at Orange Julius offering their wares. 

Orange Julius Crier (From offstage): Juliuses! Juliuses! Orange and Strawberry Juliuses, now on offer to tempt your taste buds! We also have hot dogs! 

(The voice of the crier fades out, and we see our two protagonists enter the stage from opposing sides. Jane is preoccupied sending a text message, and Pete gets temporarily distracted by a beautiful girl working at the Lady Foot Locker. As they move closer, they finally see each other.)

Jane: Hey Pete! Pete! What's up?

Pete: Oh, hi Jane! Not much. Say, what's that you've got in that bag there?

Jane: Oh, this? It's a tie that looks like a piano keyboard. It's Fathers' Day, remember? I'm going to give it to my dad later today.

Pete: Another tie that looks like a piano keyboard?? I hope you're going to be giving him some sort of alcohol first, to numb his senses and help him forget what a disappointing gift-giver his daughter's become!

Jane: Well, there's no need to be mean about it, but you're right, actually. I know that my father's a traveling magician and keyboard player, but I think he's been faking his enthusiasm about the last couple of keyboard ties I gave him. But I just can't think of anything better! What e'er shall I do?!

Pete: Gosh, Jane, looks like you've got yourself tied up, but I think I just might have the solution for you! 

Jane: Oh, if you could help me, I'd owe you so big time.

Pete: I have the perfect gift for you; why not get your old man a lovely set of German loanwords from the Sitzman ABC Platinum Collection?

Jane: Pete, that's the perfect Fathers' Day gift, obviously, but how will I ever be able to afford it? Will I have to sell my hair to get money to buy those German loanwords? They must cost a fortune!

Pete: Absolutely not--you get to keep that lovely hair right on your head! That's the best thing about the Platinum Collection at Sitzman ABC: It's completely free! So instead of giving your dad some crappy tie, why not give him something he'll use and enjoy? The Platinum Collection from Sitzman ABC has so many wonderful, elegant German loanwords, and they're all gathered together into one convenient package. It's got almost too many words to mention here, but you'll get beautiful words like kindergarten, delicatessen, realpolitik, angst, gesundheit...

Jane (interrupts excitedly): What about schadenfreude?

Pete: You bet your ass you get schadenfreude! 

Jane: I'm sold! I'd better get there soon--but where's there store? The mall maps are always so hard to read! 

Pete: Jane, that's the best part! The German loanwords collection from Sitzman ABC's Platinum Collection is available exclusively online at Sitzman ABC, which means that you won't have to go to the mall and interact with the dregs of society just to get a decent Fathers' Day gift!

(They hold hands, and turn together and walk slowly towards the mall exit.)

Jane: Oh, Pete, that's wonderful! (Pause) And I know you'll make a great father, too!

Pete: A great... a great... whaaat?

Jane (quietly, looking down): A father, Pete.

Pete (perplexed, almost in a whisper): But how can this be?

Jane: I think you know how, Pete.

Pete: I told you that drinking coconut milk and chamomile tea wasn't a form of birth control! Ach, Schei�e!

(As they quietly walk out of the mall, the curtain drops.) 

What's Going On On This Side?

Since I know you've likely got a lot of time on your hands, I thought I'd mention my Sitzman ABC blog. Many of you have possibly seen it or heard me mention it, but if you've not checked it out yet, consider doing so. 

I originally made the site geared towards my students, so it had a lot of tips about the English language, but I've recently tried to make it more about languages and language learning in general, so there may be something that's interesting for you, even if you're a native speaker. I've talked about podcasts, the free Kindle program for your computer or cell phone, recommended web sites, and, most recently, loanwords (hence the picture here). Additionally, I've started to provide more resources for people who want to learn Spanish, German, or Swedish.

So, if you've not gone to the blog, maybe you should. What if you miss something incredible? Plus, if you have any suggestions of topics related to language I could write about, I'd be happy to hear from you. You can even "like" the page on Facebook or follow it on Twitter. Thanks for reading, and I'll hope to see you there sometime soon!